Aspirations

I have some aspirations, they aren't grandiose, or pipe dreams, they are little things in my life I would like to change.  Little things that will make me feel better about myself, prevent stress, and make me feel like I've achieved adulthood.

• I want to use reusable bags every time I go to the grocery store.  I hate the overflowing cupboard full of plastic bags!  They are a huge waste of space and bad for the environment.  Not only will I feel good about myself for doing something good for the environment, eventually I will have another cupboard available to store things that are actually worth-while.
• I want to be one of those people that "can't go to bed unless the kitchen is clean".  I hate having a dirty kitchen, and yet mine is always in a state of chaos.  
• I want to make my bed every day.  They say if you make the bed you are more likely to keep the rest of your house in order.  It also keeps your blankets from getting all wonky and your husband from accusing you of blanked-hogging.
• I want to be a *fit* person.  I have been the last two months, and I'd like it to continue.  I had surgery on my foot, which has slowed me down slightly, but I am still managing a gym-visit three times a week to lift weights.
• I want to work on ONE PROJECT AT A TIME!  I am always in the middle of at least 6 projects at any given time.  This means that I hardly ever complete any projects because I keep jumping back and forth between them.  It also means that my house is a mess because each project is sitting out.  
• I need to clean up after myself.  Simple, you would think.  Make a meal, clean the dishes.  Finish a project, put all the tools away.  Take something out, put it away when done.  

As you can tell I really struggle with house-management.  It's not because I wasn't raised well, my mom tried hard to instill values of cleanliness.  They just didn't stick.  I'm finding out that being a messy person is more work than being an organized one.  I'm not doing a clean-sweep of the house this time.  I'm taking it little by little, day by day.  Before I leave a room I look around and to do one thing to make it better before leaving.  I am also working on finishing individual projects.

I don't want my house to be a constant disaster area.  I want to have friends and family over at the drop of a hat without worrying about whether or not there will be a place for them to sit (because right now there's crap occupying all the seats).

I can do this...

treading water

Well, I've gone up about 1.5 pounds since last week.  So, not much has happened weight-wise in my month and a half of faithful gym membership.

I am discouraged!  But I am pushing ahead!  I want to carry out this program for the full 3 months.  I AM really proud of myself for sticking to my exercise plan this month and a half, I just wish I had more to show for it.  Maybe things are happening to my body I'm not aware of.

Perhaps what my dietician is telling me IS too good to be true...  I am really tempted to try something new, but am trying to resist the urge. 

Is it possible to just have a body that doesn't respond to diet and exercise? 

more more more!

Over the past month I have probably increased my food intake by 50% using my dietician's guidelines.  And I have not gained any weight!  In fact I have lost a little!  Today was my 1 month check-in and I am very proud of myself.  I have been getting to the gym 5-6 days per week and have made several modifications to my diet:

• I found 2 healthy cereals that I like.  The guidelines for a "good" cereal are 3g of Fiber per 100 calories.  A serving should be around 100 calories and about a cup (I would say at least 3/4).  My 2 cereals are plain Kix and a generic version of Vanilla Almond Special K which I buy at Aldis.  I'm really loving the Special K right now. *A note on generics, always check the labels!  Walmarts generic version of this same cereal only has 1 gram  of fiber!
• I also added fruit to my breakfast.  A 1/2 Cup of frozen berries, which I warm in the microwave, are added to breakfast almost all the time.  Some days I do get lazy and skip this step, but not often.
• I've incorporated more whole grains into my diet.  The hunt for whole wheat bread that I really enjoy is still on, but the good news is I am off the white bread.  I DO still miss it, nothing beats sourdough in my book.  Besides bread, I've made brown rice a couple times this month to go with dinner, and my friend Carrie gave me my first taste of Quinua!  It was good!
• Continuing with whole grains I found a snack that I enjoy: Quaker Mini Rice Cakes.  They come in all different flavors, and eat like a potato chip.  The background rice-cake flavor actually reminds me of popcorn.  (popcorn is a whole grain so that is a great snack too, but I can't stand the texture.  yes I am weird).  A snack should be roughly 100 calories.  These snacks are a little saltier than the nutritionist would like, I am going to compare the different flavors and see if one has less than the others.  She said it is fine to have, but probably not more than 3x per week.
• Before I started this program my lunch consisted of a banana at noon and a milk-based chai tea in the afternoon.  I now eat lunch every single day.  Some days I have a serving of Progresso Soup (there are 2 per can), a piece of whole wheat toast, and a glass of milk.  Other days I make myself a 2 egg omelet with LOTS of mushrooms, green onion and 1/2 a slice of colby cheese along with a piece of whole wheat toast and milk.
• Dinner has pretty much stayed the same.  We have salad before dinner more often and I stop eating when I am full.  I have always made our meals from scratch so there wasn't too much to improve upon.

Pretty good right?  And yet, my nutritionist says I am STILL not eating enough!  She would like to see me get 2 servings of grains at breakfast and lunch as apposed to one and I need a second snack.  I also need to keep working on eating more vegetables throughout the day.  Apparently your metabolism can't work properly if you don't eat enough.  Is it possible I have been keeping myself overweight all this time by not eating enough?  It sounds like crazy talk!  I mean geez, if I had to feel fat all these years the least I could've been doing was eating a bunch of cake... not just a banana.  Oiy!